While I appreciate that I have become a bit dramatic, it has
occurred to me that I spend a lot of my life trying to keep my emotions in
check. Perhaps in an effort to protect my heart, I try to keep myself from
falling as madly in love as I have a tendency to do. To let your heart feel so
much puts you in a very vulnerable position. And, humans, at their very core,
try to avoid being vulnerable. We try to stay in our comfort zone where it is
safe and cozy and try not to give our heart to things that could hurt it.
But sometimes all it takes is 20 seconds of insane courage,
and something great will come from it (We Bought a Zoo reference haha I am a
loser).
When I left for Spain, I didn’t just tip-toe out of my
comfort zone, I dove out of it headfirst. I had never left the United States
ever, and I have very rarely been on my own. I stepped off of the plane more
out of my comfort zone more vulnerable and out of my comfort zone as I have
ever been. I put all of my faith and trust in Granada, relying on others to
help me out.
Was it scary? Absolutely. But I now feel like the
relationships that I have made with the people and Granada itself, are some of
the most genuine and real relationships that I have ever had. So, to me, it is
only natural that I would love deeper here, because I put myself in this
position of vulnerability.
Maybe what I have learned most is that sometimes it is okay
to be vulnerable and to open yourself up. Sometimes it is going to hurt, but
when it is worth it, it is really worth it. Even though I know that leaving
here will break my poor little over stuffed heart like crazy,, I do not regret
falling in love like I did.
On a side note, my showers have FINALLY gotten hot. Like the
only thing I didn’t like was the
showers, and now that is fixed. So womp. More things to have to leave.
On the plus side, I can’t WAIT to see everyone! besos to
all!
